5th January

Although the weather so far in January has been absolutely amazing today was not so good, quite cool and quite grey.  I think the weather gods had captured my mood perfectly.  Today I was going down to Mum's to go with her to the Doctors to try and shed some light on the funny turn she had on Christmas Day and to try and make a decision on her continuing to drive - I knew this was going to be a difficult conversation because Mum would feel that without the car her independence would be gone.

I arrived down with her early.  I wanted to do some calculations to show her how much the car cost her annually - her tax, MOT, service and Insurance are all due soon, her Licence renewal in May so if she were not to be given the Doctor's approval for the renewal she would have paid out a considerable amount of money for nothing really and I think we both felt that the approval was probably not going to be forthcoming.

I can't get her to understand that whilst taxis seem expensive she doesn't take into consideration, when she gets in the car, what it is actually costing her to do that trip.  So we had that conversation this morning because I wanted her to realise that if she did give up driving she didn't need to be sat stuck indoors and she was lucky enough to have money in the bank to enable her to get out and about.  John's Mum is my trump card in this regard, she travels all over the place by taxi (and bus) so just takes that additional cost on the chin.  

The appointment with Mum's Doctor could not have gone better really.  Dr Mala was brilliant with Mum and part way through the conversation Mum made the decision that she was going to give up driving and would do so before her Insurance was due which actually gives her about six weeks to get her head fully around saying goodbye to the car - which, very kindly, she wants to give to me.

I have tried to assure her that John and I will be on hand as much as possible and make sure that Sundays we either go down to her or go out to eat or one or other of us will go and pick her up and bring her to us then take her home again.  I have said I will go down for a day (probably Thursdays unless she gets a better offer) and will take her shopping, or out for a drive, or whatever she fancies plus I will always take her to any appointment she has.  Other than that she can continue to go to her hairdresser (by taxi) or anywhere else she wants to go and I will tell her if she is running out of money (which is unlikely).

Having made her decision it was almost like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders and we had a lovely remainder of the day.  We set off from the Doctors into town so that I could get some cat litter for Mum and some cash from the bank.  We actually had a mooch around Sklavenitis which we haven't done for a very long time in any shop - she just hasn't seemed interested - but today we looked various things that they had for sale and actually had a conversation about them.  

We then continued on to the Amphitheatre Cafe in Tala.  We very nearly didn't make it because just as we were entering Tala a car came whipping around the bend sideways snaking as the guy driving was struggling to keep control.  We avoided him thankfully, and even more thankfully he seemed to avoid the car behind and must have got the car under control.  

Mum and I had a lovely lunch at the Amphitheatre.  We shared a sausage panini and followed that by sharing some lemon drizzle cake with lemon curd sauce.  Mum even bought a takeaway portion of the cake and sauce for me to give to John as a present.

Incredibly I think it was the most relaxed I have seen her in a very long time.  I have told her she can choose what we do on a Thursday - I am happy to go with the flow but if she gets a better offer she is to accept and I can see her on a different day.

It was with some relief that I made my way home via Shuks for my meat order.  I had been anticipating the most awful day and it just hadn't panned out that way for which I was really grateful.