5 years, gone in a flash

My lovely Dad left us unexpectedly five years ago today.  It was a Sunday and we had been expecting him and Mum to come for lunch.  We had bought a fabulous rib of beef especially for him.  He never got to eat it. 

Sometimes it feels like he has been gone for much longer than five years and sometimes it feels like is was just yesterday - one thing for sure is that he would never ever have coped with the bonkers life we had during Covid.  

Mum doesn't talk about Dad's passing much and she doesn't like going to the cemetery so John and I go and have a chat with him and make sure he has some flowers although this time of year the pots are looking a bit ragged.

Today Mum had asked if we could remember Dad by going to one of his favourite restaurants, Sonny's which overlooks Banana Bay.  Lilian was coming with us and we were picking her up.  Mum had insisted that she wanted to drive.  It will be one of the last Sunday's that she still has a car at her disposal.  I know this is going to be massive but I do really think the time is right - her memory, balance and reactions are diminished and so although she thinks she is ok in reality she isn't and one day she might have caused an accident much worse than taking out our green bin.  She is lucky to have friends and family who will help when her circumstances change - if she will let them!

It was a glorious day but we knew Mum would feel the cold so we were sat inside - this is the view from our table.  Mum was understandably quiet but we have realised that she is better on a one to one basis on occasions like this.  Being in an echoey room means that she is detached from the conversation so seems to get bored or jealous if everyone else is chatting.  I made the fatal mistake of asking her if she would like to change seats so she could hear better - for some inexplicable reason this always goes down like a lead balloon.  Sometimes I cannot do right for doing wrong!

We have not eaten at Sonny's for some time.  It was where Mum and Dad held their Diamond Wedding Anniversary party back in 2015.  The proprietor Chris let us have a free hand in what we did with the room by way of decoration and entertainment and he did the food.  He is no longer in the kitchen for health reasons but front of house so he made a special point of chatting to Mum as he has known her for years.  

Chris said that he sometimes bumps into Mum in Paps - he had noticed how much she has shrunk and how much quieter she has become - she used to be the life and soul of a party, but I think all the lockdowns deprived her of conversation and she has lost the knack to engage.

We came home via Donna's Farm to pick up some home cooked sausage rolls with her home made red onion chutney and a tray of fresh free range eggs from free roaming and organically fed chickens - I am expecting great things.  Donna was in good form regaling us with the story of her Gander for whom spring has sprung and without a girlfriend had turned his amorous intentions towards the chickens and ducks!  Donna had gone off this morning to get him some love interests hoping that the chickens and ducks would then be left alone.

We then called into the Winery to grab a box of wine before the price is increased in March - still good value but nowhere near the good value it was when we first came but then name me something that hasn't increased in price over the last 12 months - Ukraine cannot be to blame for them all surely?  

The Winery Dog knows John and knows that John has dog treats in the car so he came shooting out to ensure that he did not miss out which of course he did not.

It looked like the winery was getting ready for a wedding as there was a delivery of flowers and balloons.  I had seen it was going to be shut for a couple of days so maybe that is the reason why.

Although full from the lunch we had consumed (three courses with coffee) we couldn't resist sampling one of the still warm sausage rolls whilst trying to watch the Blades game.  Our TV/Internet was awful tonight - almost as though the signal was being 'jammed' as there was a cyclical pause every five seconds which made watching the football a nightmare.  The VPN didn't improve anything either.  Anyway the Blades won which was good enough for John and we started to watch The Gold without too much issue.